I've made a definitive decision. I'm going to study American Sign Language, and interpret it for a living. It's taken me two years of sitting alone in my room to come to this conclusion without deep reservations, but I've done it.
There was a preview of the whole affair here, but the entry isn't really required reading. The only reason I'm even linking it is because it includes this sentence: 'It's the linguistic equivalent of a gangbang.' And, well, when you find something like that, you have to show it off.
But here's the point: I'll be starting school this fall. Wish I'd done so sooner, but various episodes of flaking out, terror of growing up, and generally being a procrastinating idiot have led to my not enrolling so far. Which is just as well, really. I wasn't ready to reenter formalised education until now. Part of me wants to go this next term, honestly, but I figure it's best to wait until fall. Mostly because I want to visit people in the meantime.
I'm just glad that I'm finally ready for it. Have finally decided what I want to study and, ultimately do with my life. I've occasionally worried that I'd never reach that point, but.
I do want to grow up now. To carry my own weight, and as quickly as possible. And it will take years. And, unlike before, this actually frustrates me. I figure this is a good sign.
I'm actually motivated. As I haven't been in years. It's a huge relief.
I just hope being schooled doesn't interfere with my education.
revoless.
3:17 a.m.
March 16, 2004.
Listening to: Dresden Dolls.