Time is odd for me. Lately it's been passing extraordinarily quickly. Hours will go by like minutes, months feel like weeks. Years months. It wouldn't disconcert me except when the clock suddenly says it's seven in the morning, or I go back to find dates of events, and realise they happened a month ago, and not just a week or two ago.
I don't know why it's been traveling so fast for me lately. It's insane. I can't quite keep up, and am left trying to grasp and hold onto things.
But then I'm not. I've been pretty fucking stable the past month (month!), and perhaps for longer than that, mostly by not lingering on things. They come in, I acknowledge them, I move on. Mostly.
Occasionally I freak out and think too much. This can be good or bad for my mood, but I think it's probably a bad habit in either case, and am trying to kill it. Focus on moments, and staying in them. Keeps anything from getting internally out of hand, and that's the essential thing.
My thoughts are fairly clear right now. And I'm tired. So I'm going to try to sleep.
The past couple of entries have been obscenely short. I've just felt more secretive lately. At least in the context of this diary. I'll get to writing longer entries eventually.
revoless.
8:14 p.m.
August 17, 2003.
Listening to: Solex.